Tuesday, September 8, 2015

Five Days Postpartum

I am so enamored of these little boys. Their tiny hands, eyelashes, noises, everything is so adorable. I certainly do not love when they wake up at 3 am and cry nonstop for 30 minutes, but I do not find myself ever feeling too negative about anything. I guess the struggle to bring them into the world really has made me a better mother. And the same for my husband. We are so in awe of being able to create these precious lives.

Thankfully they arrived without a problem at 6.1 and 5.4 pounds. When they were wrapped up and walked out of the OR with C, I realized in my drugged up state that they would not see NICU! 

Unfortunately, I did not recover as well and other obstacles arose after. During recovery, my blood pressure spiked to 190? Over 99 and would not budge. Weird, because I actually fine. But since it would not decline, I had to stay in recovery until they forced it to lower with magnesium, which made me feel so nauseous. And had to stay on magnesium for 24 hours which meant no nice labor suite but a tiny ass room with no bathroom and C sleeping in a chair. But at least boys were allowed in there with us. 

It was hard, though, being hooked up to several IV bags, wires everywhere, nausea galore. I threw up while breastfeeding the boys. Luckily not on them because of intervention by C and nurses. People coming in and out to check on me, boys, give us info and sometimes scary like one twin with low blood sugar. Me fighting to breastfeed them despite the easy fix of formula. Me fighting to see them but having to wait forever because the nursery was on a different floor. 

The next day was better when we finally were moved upstairs. (Though removal of catheter and peeing first time - OW!!!) Blood sugar issues with other twin, and hospital's decision to give him formula. Me worried it would permanently scar breastfeeding and receiving update with judgmental friends present who thought I just did not advocate enough. 

Long night of no one sleeping. Blood sugar stabilized but twins cluster feeding and taking 30 minute breaks at most. Feeling a lot of pain but nausea and drowsiness and "drunkenness" from pain meds. Just drifting off but getting interruptions to take vitals, check babies, bring pain meds, take food order, bring food, be visited by OB on call, be visited by pediatrician on call, trying to ask questions and imbibe information through the haze. 

Next day same thing but felt slightly better and twins have stabilized. Took first shit and it hurt so bad. Working through one twin's squirminess and crying when trying to get him to latch. Getting nurse and lactation consultant's help but they make it seem easy. When I am on my own with C's help we are so much worse. One nurse thinks tongue tie is the issue but pedi on call does not agree. 

Trying to soak up all the knowledge before we are released unceremoniously into the workd. But the time comes and we arrive home with our boys. 

We are getting better each day. C and I are a great team. C is a great father. My love for him has reached new depths. My body looks and feels horrible which is far worse to me than sleeplessness or anything else. But it will get better. It will get smoother.

First pedi appointment today and one twin is already over birth weight, other very close. And at only five days, when they hope for this milestone by two weeks!! So even with slight tight tongue, we are making exclusive breastfeeding work so far and I am proud and happy. The twins are all that matter. 

Baby A (though B in utero) - A
Baby B - P


  1. Ah! Squishes! I hear the magnesium is a bitch! I've been hand expressing and freezing my colostrum to take to the hospital *just in case*. I also have a tongue tie so we'll be checking for that asap. So glad things went good and they are beautiful!

  2. For some reason this didn't show up in my blog feed right away, but congrats! Sounds like you are doing great, all things considered. The first couple weeks for me have been rough, so you're a champ managing with two!