9w6d and the Sad State of Our Sex Life

I had an ultrasound today. I was not supposed to have another one until my NT scan in two weeks, but my anxiety at waiting four weeks between ultrasounds was too much to bear, so I asked my OB if I could have an extra one. The tech at that office is on vacation this week, so I got sent to the hospital to have one. And I insisted that C accompany me, because I'm too scared to be there alone and get bad news. 

It was weird to be in a hospital, but the techs were great and I got to see the babies! They were moving their arms and legs around which was so cool to me. Simply a beautiful sight for my scared mind. They are still on top of each other laying sideways. Baby A's ass is on top of Baby B's face lol. They did not provide measurements though I did glimpse one baby's heartbeat was 174. But that was fine with me. I mainly wanted to know they were alive. 

Anyway, not much else happening. Still hungry a lot. Grilled cheese has been a fave lately as well as almond milk mixed with regular milk.  

Our sex life has really taken a hit. It was bad while we struggled with infertility but we are still not back in our groove. Part of it is me, I know I get more tired by 9 pm and that is tough because C does not get home til 8 and we aren't even done eating til around 8:30 except for Fridays. Part of the problem is on the weekends we have been trying to finish painting the outside of our house, which makes it hard for sexy times. And C is insecure about his past ED so he does not initiate because of that. Ugh, I really want to fix this soon because I don't know when restrictions may start, and of course right after giving birth is not a time to rejuvenate the sex life. 

This is what I mean. Infertility does not go away or get cured when you become pregnant. Yes, the struggles change, but normalcy regarding pregnancy and birth does not automatically arrive, either.