Showing posts with label Operating Room. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Operating Room. Show all posts

Thursday, August 27, 2015

36w2d - At Most One Week Left

It is surreal to write "at most one week left." Frightening, exciting, wonderful. So many emotions. I am still scared at being on an operating table. Thankfully, I just found out yesterday that it is not standard procedure at my hospital to strap my arms down. Now, hopefully my arms will not flail about and I can have control of at least one. I still worry will I be able to breastfeed? Will C and I have to fight for the ability to breastfeed in the OR? Will we able to enjoy the moment our babies are born, or will people be all up in our shit?

Will the babies be ok? Will they have fluid in their lungs and ears? Will they be non-responsive, too tiny, too weak to be passed into my arms? Will I feel too drugged up or nauseous to want to hold them?

Yes, I realize this is just one day in their lives, and even if the birth experience is not smooth, we will still bond as a family. But damnit, this is likely my only birth experience and I want it to be somewhat pleasant! It is already being skewed by being a C section and in the OR. 

Because these boys are still breech. They are squished. I barely even feel them move anymore, though ultrasound assures me they are squirming constantly. 

I was not dilated nor effaced at 35w2d, the last (and thankfully only!) time this was checked. I have one or two contractions per day that I notice - I assume there are more but I never feel them. The babies have dropped a bit  and besides the swelling, soreness, fatigue and largeness, I feel good and like I could last a few more weeks if needed.

So hopefully they will stay put until a week from today. There is a tropical storm/hurricane on its way this weekend and people have gleefully reminded me that these weather conditions incite births. (WHY someone wants to wish labor on me, I do not know. But shut the fuck up.) Hopefully it will just be a lot of rain and babies will stay put. I really do not want to deal with hurricane hysteria at the hospital, especially in combination with an emergency/unscheduled C section.